I Purchased a Lesbian Wedding-Cake Topper to Irritate my Roomies


I purchased a lesbian wedding-cake topper to irritate my roomies.

Yes, I showed it on the highest kitchen area counter.

Yes, I still have it.

No, I do not regret it.

I understood the scary stories about random-roommate matching.

Tales of roomies locking each other out in the middle of the night swam through my mind as I went home searching. I heard whatever from buddies separating to those random matches damaging personal effects.

My friend and I listened to all of these stories and batted our eyes. No chance would that occur to us. We brushed aside all of those improbable fabrications and signed our leases. We devoted ourselves to a four-bedroom, four-bathroom home simply south of the University of Florida school.

After completing our character kinds for the coordinating procedure, we excitedly handed all the documents in. We hoped to the roomie– gods above to please, please provide us relaxed individuals. Simply a good set of women. Please.

And we did get a good set of women as our roomies. We smiled at each other as all of us carried in boxes filled with clothing and brand-new plates into the typical location. Our moms and dads made little talk as we assisted each other unpack all of our things. They were great.

A lot of bad roomie stories are a scary program from the beginning. You relocate, and they right away lick all your plates in the evening or ‘mistakenly’ consume the remaining Chinese food that you ‘d been conserving in the refrigerator and eagerly anticipating all the time. Their bad characters spend time them like a bad odor, and you understand your brand-new roomies will be bothersome prior to you can even hang up the drapes. This wasn’t like that.

Like I stated, we did get great roomies.

However they were just great to our faces.

Passive aggressive messages in the home group chat? Inspect. Our food vanishing from the refrigerator? Inspect. Stress so concrete in the living location when we’re entirely that you can connect and feel the stress and anxiety? Inspect, examine and examine.

My friend and I are bleeding– heart liberals. We like to make jokes about being each others’ spouses, and it’s extremely clear who we chose in the 2016 election. It’s likewise extremely clear who our 2 other roomies chose.

So, I purchased the lesbian cake topper. I likewise disputed purchasing rainbow banners and a pride flag, however the topper would be sufficient. I understand it was as similarly passive aggressive as their snarky texts and irritating notes. What can I state?

They utilized to conceal the wedding event cake topper from us when they had good friends over. We ‘d get home and discover the 2 bride-to-bes behind the TELEVISION or in the kitchen area cabinets. However that wasn’t all.

Often, they attempted to remove our presence completely. They folded up our adorable great early morning notes to each other and tossed them in the garbage. They eliminated our strategies from the home calendar.

Naturally, I understand my buddy and I weren’t innocent either. We kept up late and joked obnoxiously in the typical location, and we did purchase home decoration for the sole function of frustrating them. We did incorrect, too.

Those 2 women vacated last spring. I hope they forgive my buddy and me for our immaturity. We have actually progressed roomies now as we enter our sophomore year. You can’t agree everybody. Often you simply need to purchase a lesbian cake topper to frighten them away, and after that forgive them later on.


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